When we found out that Ford was on his way, I had a bit of a crisis of self. I was feeling weird and sick and just not at all sure about being a mommy and what new shape our life was going to take. We were also in the middle of some big life changes that were a bit stressful and so slowly I quit blogging. It wasn't a conscious decision, but posts became more and more rare until they finally dried up all together.
I also slowly quit teaching my sewing classes (Ford was born the week after a Sewing 101 course finished up…Yikes!) And then, of course, after he was born I got swept away in the frantic sea of motherhood. I'm going to be honest with you- I didn't adjust gracefully. It was very hard early on for me to be a mommy and to feel like my true self.
I felt a little lost and confused, but also very much in love with my baby and getting to spend my days with him. Motherhood is all consuming. It's so easy to lose your sense of self- the things that make you feel like YOU! Or that's what I've found to be true for me.
Along and along I started to realize what made me feel most myself; I needed to be making things and I needed to spend more time with friends. Simple as that. I feel best when I'm social and when I have a project going. I think this is what people mean when they say, "Ugh. I just feel awful when I don't exercise." I think. I can't be positive because I have never felt that way about exercise in my life.
As I was coming to this realization, my friend Jessica approached me and encouraged me to be brave and really dive back in to Greener Grass as a blog and a serious business. She took me seriously and it made me take myself more seriously. She has now become my amazing business manager and constantly wows me with her spreadsheets, calendars, percentages, and overall general business savvy.
(By the way, most Greener Grass emails and billing are done by Jessica. Don't be confused if you see her name on something! She's nice. You'll love her. And you'll appreciate that she will email you right back, whereas I would probably accidentally delete your message!)
I'm a maker and a teacher and I'm so grateful that Greener Grass gives me the chance to do both of those things. I'm grateful for people like Jessica and David and my parents who push me to be brave and follow my dreams. And I'm grateful that the business helps to support my little family so I can spend my days with little Fordzilla as a stay at home mommy.
I just wanted to give you a little behind the scenes look at what's going on with us. I'm so happy to be connecting with so many people again through Greener Grass. I hope that you'll take a class or schedule a craft party. I would love to hang out with you!
Love you. Mean it.